Without You
by Switchblade Katchoo
Summary: How can you affect me so easily? A/O


_"So tell me you can stay, I get so lonely without you. My feet won't leave the ground. Can't stand to be away. I get so lonely without you. (I hate to be this way) Just spend a little while, I get so lonely without you. This always brings me back. Patience is not my style, I get so lonely without you."_

There was a sadness lingering within the depths of Olivia Benson's gaze as she watched the blonde ADA, Alexandra Cabot, walk out of the bar. She'd only been there for a few minutes to catch up and bring the Detectives up to speed on their latest case. Yet, as Olivia's head turned slightly to keep the taller woman in her sight, something akin to loss washed across the brunette's features in the dim lighting of the booth she occupied. An emotion easily recognized by her partner, Elliot Stabler. He drummed his fingertips against the tabletop between them, waiting until she returned her attention to where his was patiently waiting, one brow arched in silent question.

"What?" Olivia's own brow furrowed in confusion at the way her partner was looking at her. She wrapped one hand around her half empty bottle of beer and brought it up to eagerly waiting lips.

"Nothing. Nothing." Elliot let the moment slip by so as not to embarass or anger his partner. He knew better than to tangle with the subject of love and loss, as his own track record wasn't exactly spotless. "I'm beat. Ready for a cab, Liv?" Elliot reached for his wallet and pulled out several bills, letting them drop on the table. He looked across at Olivia when she didn't answer and wasn't surprised that her eyes had returned to the doorway of the bar. "Earth to Liv." He rapped his knuckles on her free arm, which was draped along the tabletop.

"Yeah, what?" Olivia jumped, startled. Her tone verged on annoyance as she re-adjusted herself in the booth.

"Roll the tongue back in your mouth before you trip on it, Liv. I asked if you were ready to leave and get a cab." Elliot chuckled despite the hard glare he was being given. He pulled himself free of the booth, stretching his arms upwards and popping his back with a low grunt.

"I'll walk. Thanks anyways, El." Olivia sighed and rubbed a hand over her face. She wasn't quite ready to admit that the woman she'd been pining over the past few weeks was their newly appointed ADA. Not to mention she didn't think anyone even knew she dated women anyways. Even Elliot. "See you Monday." She added a few bills to the ones her partner deposited, following after him as he walked out into the crisp night air.

"See ya Liv. Be careful out there!" Elliot stood on the edge of the sidewalk and hailed a cab, watching his partner shuffle in the opposite direction before getting in once it arrived.

There was a haunting familiarity surrounding Alexandra, something Olivia just couldn't pinpoint that drove her absolutely insane when they were in the same room together. She felt as if they'd known one another somewhere before, at another time in their lives perhaps. Maybe even another lifetime all together, she often mused. Olivia felt a strong attraction towards the tall blonde, not solely based on the other woman's beauty, though that was definitly a good reason. No, Olivia was attracted to all the things that comprised Alexandra Cabot from within. Her fierce personality, her cool exterior, the take no shit attitude when dealing with criminals and extreme confidence she exuded when displaying her impressive courtroom skills before judge, jury and officers. Alexandra looked like the kind of woman who's meals weren't under twenty dollars and who's drinks cost triple that. She had a classic, vintage style to her beauty that was rare in this day and age, truly sophisticated.

And Olivia had to wonder where a common, working class cop like herself fit into the lifestyle of one Alexandra Cabot.

"Detective Benson?" Her title was said in question, as if her presence were totally unexpected. Olivia lifted her head and swore her heart skipped when she came face to face with the SVU's ADA.

"Cabot?" Olivia deferred to the woman's last name, not wanting to offend by using her first when they'd only known each other for a short time. "Everything alright?" She asked, casting a look around the area and noting only a few darkened figures lurking in the corners of the buildings surrounding them.

"Please, call me Alex. We aren't in court, Detective." Alexandra was seated on a low bench used for one of the many inner city bus stops. She was leaning back, one arm draped across the back end, her legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. Her composure was entirely relaxed, though one could question the neatly pressed skirt and white blouse she wore just to lounge upon a greasy plastic bench. As if expecting this question, the blonde laughed softly and sat upright with both hands clasped in her lap. "Even i'm allowed a few minutes outside of my cage, Detective. Sit." She turned her head to gesture towards the empty space beside her.

"Alright, but you have to call me Liv." Olivia felt a knot of tension and excitment ball up in her stomach. She swallowed hard, praying her nervouseness and fear didn't shine through like a lighthouse beacon. "Ah...I wasn't..." She stumbled for a response to the cage remark, sinking down in the spot beside Alexandra with a small laugh of her own. Her right hand began to rub at the back of her neck, eyes unable to meet with the blonde's clear blues. "No offense, Alex, but I really didn't expect to see you out here."

"Likewise." Alex exhaled softly, tilting her head to one side as she peered across the street at a calico cat sniffing through garbage that was collected in the gutter. "My attorney image dictates I should be sipping wine with the big boys at a pricey club downtown, far from the eyes of the city commoners. Sometimes, sure, I don't mind that sort of thing. And sometimes i'd rather sit in the back of a local bar, drinking beer and unwinding with people who are _really _my friends." Alex shook her head softly. "Know what, Liv?" She asked, turning her attention towards the brunette sitting beside her.

"What?" Olivia had been listening intently the entire time. She understood the need to fit in, even enjoying it when you could go where other people couldn't. Then there were times when a bottle of beer and a group of friends stuffed into a crowded bar meant everything in the world. So yes, she could relate on that level, if only there. Olivia's chocolate brown orbs lifted to meet the clear, icey gaze already waiting.

"I should have been a Detective." Alex smirked, her hand brushing against Olivia's arm before the she stood. "Monday?"

"Monday." Olivia felt a tingling sensation trail after the touch against her arm. She shivered lightly and was thankful that Alex stood, so she didn't notice the reaction.

"Have a good night, Liv." Alex said as she began walking away.

Olivia felt her lips part, except nothing was freed for a response. Instead she remained rooted to her spot on the bus stop bench. Again that sense of utter loss and heartache pained the Detective's chest and she took in several deep breaths to steady herself before she, too, wandered away into the night.

A good night indeed, Olivia mused silently.

**END**

(song: 'So Lonely' Superjesus)


End file.
